Day by Day
by Running Through A Fantasy
Summary: He didn't believe his mom died from some stupid illness, and he never would. But now...Will he die from it too?  8059, mild language, and a 17 year old setting.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer**: I don't own KHR, you would know if I did. :)

**Warning: **YamaGoku fanfic (don't like, don't read), 17 year old setting and some language.

**Summary**: He didn't believe his mom died from some stupid illness, and he never would. But now...Will he die from it too?

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><p>It was humid, it was wet, and it had been raining all day. That alone pissed Gokudera off.<p>

The now soaked teen walked home alone in the downpour, hands shoved in his pockets and a scowl fused upon his pale face. He took a deep breath and tried to focus on walking straight on the wet pavement. _'Stupid cold, messing with my head…'_

Gokudera had just left school after succeeding in getting another after school detention. But as usual, he said it wasn't his fault. According to him at least. It was that pain-in-the-ass teacher's fault for pissing him off and causing him to snap out a mouthful of curse words. It was also his fault that the bastard Hibari caught him screaming at the poor science teacher. And of course, Hayato got stuck at school for an extra three hours.

The sun had finally dipped down over the horizon and the sky had begun to darken, letting the Italian rest his eyes from the bright light. Gokudera made his way onto the street were his apartment was, starting to shiver form his cold body. He had already told a certain someone to meet him there like usual, despite his detention, and could feel a familiar warmth spread through his stomach. It kind of felt good knowing someone who cared about you was at your house waiting for you to return home.

Gokudera rubbed his head and forced the warmth to go away. He didn't need these extra feelings and emotions, it only messed with his head, and he didn't need that happening more then often. Besides, it was only Yamamoto, Takeshi, nobody special.

Although he tried to hide it as much as possible, he and baseball idiot were now a couple. It became official a year ago when Yamamoto had told his confession to Gokudera in the middle of a hospital room.

The day before they had been on a mission that Reborn had sent only the Sky, Storm, and Rain guardians to. They had flown to Italy to get rid of Shamal's ex-students (The ones who failed his class and used the the medicines for bad games and to torture people) who were starting to attack one of the important Mafia families up there. They worked together to fight them off, eventually winning, but some sacrifices had been made in order for their victory. Such as Gokudera blowing himself up, or Yamamoto taking a knife in the chin.

In the end, they had achieved three things: Peace, a new relationship, and a scar. It wasn't much but it was something.

Gokudera wouldn't say it out loud, especially in front of a certain idiot, but he enjoyed his company. Yamamoto had started to grow out of an immature kid and into a serious person, which made Gokudera much more fond of him. Bright red made it's way into the bomber's sighting as he stepped up to his apartment door, a large 64 written on its wooden frame. With a sigh, the Italian fumbled with the keys to open his door, which he found very hard, as his double vision grew worse. He gave up with a loud curse.

"Yamamoto!" he slammed his fist into the door several times before continuing, "Open the door!"

He didn't need to see what Yamamoto was doing, he already knew. The black haired man would be in his kitchen making him some type of dinner for he always complained how Gokudera's diet was very poor. Within seconds, the door flew open and a tall dark haired teen was there smiling down at him.

Storming past him Gokudera walked in and dropped his bag onto the floor. It took all his self-control not to just fall onto the couch and sleep, but he knew he had to get out of his wet school uniform or his cold would get worse.

A soft 'click' was made as Yamamoto shut the door. "It's good to see you all in one piece, Hayato." Yamamoto walked over to the kitchen and grabbed the clothes he had snatched for his friend as soon as he got home. "I really thought Hibari would bite you to death after today." He chuckled lightly and handed the bomber his clothes.

"Shut up." Soggy clothes piled up on the floor with a 'splat' and dry ones were slipped on, "And I told you not to call me that."

Yamamoto could only smile as he watched his boyfriend try to puff up his chest and give a glare at him. It only succeeded in making the bomber break out into a coughing fit. But before Yamamoto could react, Gokudera had walked into the kitchen and away from him.

Grabbing the handful of wet clothes, Yamamoto waited for him patiently to return. A soft breeze floated around the room from an open window, filled the apartment with the faint smell of rain. The swordsman to take a deep breath of it with the corner of his lips curled upwards. After a while, it dawned on him that his silver haired friend hadn't stopped coughing. Yamamoto put the uniform onto the couch and walked over to the kitchen, his eyebrows furrowed in worry.

"Hayato, are you alri-" Hazel eyes shot open in shock at the scene placed in front of him.

Gokudera was doubled over and holding onto the counter for support, and every time a hoarse cough came from his pale lips, blood ended up into his hand. The foul red liquid had already dotted onto the innocent floor below as it continued to drip through his long fingers.

Yamamoto ran over to him as he collapsed completely. Over come with fear, Yamamoto cried out his name in an attempt to wake him. The attempt failed and the silver haired teen stayed unconscious. Yamamoto slide to the ground and held his friend close, wiping the hair off of his forehead, feeling how warm he was. He gasped when he saw a small trail of dark red blood run outta his lover's mouth and down his chin.

"_Your sick."_


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer**: I don't own KHR, much to my disappointment.

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><p>"Where is room 34?" An urgent voice asked through his panting.<p>

"Down the hall to the right, sir." The nearest nurse replied.

He took off after that without another word, his orange sneakers squeaking as he ran. The hospital was small and way too quiet, but Tsuna didn't notice, he had been running for quite a while now and his heart was pounding in his ears. The short brunette soon saw someone he recognized and ran towards him. "Yamamoto!"

Cold brown eyes filled with confusion slowly looked up at his long time friend. "Tsuna..."

"I-I just got your message! What…what happened to Gokudera?" Tsuna tried to calm his panting down and stared at the baseball player.

Yamamoto looked back at the shut door and took a shaky breath. He best not tell Tsuna the horrible details and go right to the point. "Hayato's must have gotten something, because he coughed up some blood last night." He paused and locked eyes with Tsuna, "I haven't heard much from the nurses, but I do know that they called Dr. Shamal to come here. They wouldn't tell me anything."

Tsuna looked at Yamamoto with shock. He slowly nodded, silently telling the other that he understood. Yamamoto took a seat on one of the empty chairs in the hallway and placed his head in his hands. He gently tugged on his black hair trying to collect his thoughts, allowing Tsuna to get a real look at him.

Although Yamamoto's head was bent over, Tsuna had seen his face. Emotionless. It was as if someone had drawn an attenuated line across his face. The corner of his white polo had red smudges on it, which Tsuna guessed was blood. His pants were also very dirty, covered in mud stains and grass marks.

It turned out, that as soon as the ambulance took Gokudera to this hospital, Yamamoto had followed it at a full on sprint, not even waiting for a car or a cab or something to drive him there. It was an estimated twenty-five miles that he ran, not stopping once despite the rain, or any obstacle that got in his way. He had gotten there very late at night, pale and practically screaming and demanding where his lover was.

Tsuna took a step forward. "Yamamoto...don't worry about him," He bent down to his level and made eye contact with the baseball player, "You know Gokudera better then anyone. He's going to be fine. He wouldn't give up that easily to some silly cold."

A timid smile etched its way onto Tsuna's face as he tried to be brave and hide his fear for his friend. It was slowly mirrored by Yamamoto, as he stood up to his full height and grinned at the brunette. "Your absolutely right, I should have known that myself. Thanks Tsuna."

Yamamoto smiled on the outside, but inside he was overwhelmed with fear.

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><p>Blowing into his hands for warmth, the Italian doctor gazed outside the small window of the jet, dazed into space thinking about his younger family friend. Soft white clouds brushed up against the side of the jet, as if it were blanketing it up to keep it warm from the cold air whipping by. The sky, however, was a warm orange color, showing that it was soon time for the people of Japan to head home and get a well-earned night's sleep.<p>

Taking a sip from him vodka, Shamal groaned and rubbed his face. He knew this day would come, but had dreaded and prayed that it wouldn't for years. He had warned the boy about it, hell he had even talked to his sister, trying to get him to understand the truth and accept it. But he wouldn't listen. Hayato had always been very stubborn, and he was such a tsundere.

The plane had been quiet for some time now, the only noises coming from the air conditioning or the 'tap tap' the doctor's foot made on the soft carpet underneath his shiny black shoes. With an irritable sigh, Shamal folded up the newspaper and took off his glasses. He had enough problems on his hands right now and reading about situations happening else where in the world didn't help.

A quick flick from his wrist and Shamal drowned the rest of his drink. He ordered another one as a flight attendant passed him. He was too caught up in his thoughts to be even remotely interested in women right now, considering he loved them more then anything in this world. Going back to his mental curses and swears, Shamal spun a web around the silver haired Italian and stuck himself right in the middle of it, trying to figure a way out.

"Why didn't you listen, Hayato…"

The rest of the trip was spent thinking about that sentence while the worrisome doctor made his way to Japan, hopefully, to save a life.

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><p><strong>[AN]: Im honestly surprised! When I found out I was the only person with this idea, I flipped out! <strong>

**If you liked it, please review. :D **


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer**: I don't own KHR or any of the characters.

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><p><em>Everything was black. There was no sign of anything. No sound, no smell, all signs of life had vanished into the darkness.<em>

_..._

_But...Soon, the black around him rippled and faintly he thought he heard voices. Straining his ears to listen to them he found that the center of the black grew very bright._

"_Still unconscious!" Switching hands and shinning the small light into the other eye, the paramedic checked the teen's vision._

_The white soon faded into color, and Gokudera was able to see a few things, although most of it was a blur. Where the hell was he? Was he dead? No, he couldn't be. Although he was quite a delinquent, he had gone to church everyday when he was little and had payed very close attention._

_The white grew a bit larger and the color's more defined. He silently chuckled to himself. He never thought he would actually get into Heaven, if this is what it was, he had actually thought that Hell itself would reject him from it's pits of doom. So, he couldn't be in either._

_Pushing himself, the Italian tried to un-blur the moving object's around him. He finally focused on one thing, which turned out to be a man in white clothes. His mouth was moving fast and a vein had popped in his forehead. He took a quick glance at the pair of eyes on him and waved another person over._

_Something suddenly surged in his right shoulder, plunging deep into his muscles and veins. He felt it, but couldn't find the voice to yelp out in pain. The colors of the man he had been looking at faded and starting turning darker. The corner of his vision grew black and started spreading into the world._

'_No….' He didn't want to leave. 'I wanna wake up….no!'_

_The blackness spread completely in one eye and only a small spot of white was left in the other, but soon it was covered. _

'_I don't wanna die…'_

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><p>Gokudera woke with a small gasp and a jump.<p>

He blinked a few times as his consciousness was slowly given back to him. He realized after a while he was staring at a ceiling. A small brown fan, which made a soft thump each time it turned, was placed in the center of a white room, which was decorated with a small black table and a few chairs to go with it.

Cocking his head to the left, Gokudera examined that side of the room. He was instantly greeted with the sight of several machines, including an IV, all of which he was connected to.

"Gokudera?"

Half open emerald eyes looked up towards the door and saw Tsuna, who had been waiting there in the room for him. He weakly opened his mouth to speak but his words only came out in a whisper. Tsuna hadn't heard him so he quickly grabbed his chair and placed it closer to the bed, smiling at him the whole time.

"I-I'm so glad you're awake!" He held the silver haired teen's hand, "Ive been worried sick! I'm so glad you're alright!" Gokudera smiled back at his beloved boss and gripped his hand tighter as he tried to sit up.

Tsuna hesitantly opened his mouth to stop his friend from moving too much but Gokudera had already made it all the way so he shut it, and waited for him to speak.

"Juudaime, what day is it?"

"Its the 15th, Goudera-kun." It been a little over a week since that dreadful night. The bomber's eyes widened at this shocking news. He had been out that long? "Even though you've been unconscious for so long, I'm still so happy that you actually woke up. I thought you might have gone into a coma or something."

Gokudera could see that his boss didn't want him to freak out and worry so he took a deep breath of thick, gross, hospital air and nodded. "Thank you, Juudaime. I'm happy to see you too."

"I wasn't sure if you wanted this to be a big deal or anything, so I've only told Reborn about this," He paused to gently squeeze his hand, "Yamamoto and I have come here every day for the past nine days."

It took a second, but when Gokudera realized Yamamoto actually wasn't in the petit room, he let out a soft 'ah' and looked around.

"Where is he now?"

Tsuna quickly replied, "He's finally home getting some rest. At first he wouldn't leave your side and wouldn't even come to school. Finally reborn convinced him to go home," More like threated he might add, "and rest up for when you woke up."

'_That idiot. He shouldn't worry about me that much.' _Gokudera thought to himself. Tsuna noticed his friend's eyes become distant for a moment as he thought to himself. His eyes were cast down and his gaze was on the floor below, giving him such a tranquil look.

"Juudaime…." Emerald locked eyes with his long time friend and hero, "I'm really sorry for worrying you. I was very stupid for being out that long, and I'm so sorry that you had to stay here this long just to wait for someone as pathetic as me!" He quickly bowed his head in shame and embarrassment away from the brunette.

It didn't so much that fact that Gokudera had said he was sorry for worrying him that made him mad, but that fact that he had said he was pathetic and not worthy to care about. As much as Tsuna liked Gokudera, he wished he had some self respect. But in times like these; such comments weren't necessary.

Tsuna sat up straight in his chair and let go of his hand roughly. Gokudera's head snapped up at the sudden loss of warmth and looked at Tsuna.

"How can you say that?" His eyes narrowed slightly as he stared at the silver haired, "Gokudera-kun, you mean so much to me, and saying that your not worth it...that...that's bullshit!" Gokudera jumped at the harsh words.

"Haven't we already talked about this before? You _are_ worth it! You are forever apart of this family, and you'll be worth it till the day we all die!" The smaller teen was shaking by now, his emotions piled up from the last few days spilling out all over the place, "And what about Yamamoto? What would happen if you left, or worse, died? He would be crushed! His whole world is wrapped in love and stuck upon you! Stop being so damn stubborn and selfish!"

"..."

Tsuna paused in his lecture and got a good look at the Italian. His eyes were wide and his cracked lips were slightly open. Tsuna realized that he had just cut his friend down pretty badly and sighed, looking down.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, I just-"

"Juudaime-" He tried to cut in.

"…I've- _We've_ been so worried about you, I just got scared and stressed-"

"Juudaime, I-" Frustration started to build up.

"…and I took it out on you. Your not selfish at all, if anyone its me who's selfish, I should be so grateful that your even alive right now, I-"

"TSUNA!" Tsuna's head shot up. Tsuna? Gokudera never called him Tsuna before. It had always been 'Juudaime' or 'Boss' or-

Tsuna silently gasped and froze when he saw the bomber. Gokudera's eyes were slightly red and clouded, soft eyes watered up and threatening to spill over. He had never seen the other cry before; he didn't even know that Italian could really express that much emotion.

The sight of him looking so weak and scared scared Tsuna himself and just the thought of it gave him goose bumps. But he didn't speak. Instead he stared at his friend, allowing him a chance to speak. He whispered lightly, voice cracking as he went.

"I'm sick," A shaky breath was took, "I'm really sick."

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><p><strong>[AN]: Like it? Please review! Also, Ill be happy to answer any questions.<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** I don't own KHR or any of their characters. If I did, 8059 would be a LAW! XD

**[AN]: This is a flashback chapter, so...yeah. ^^ It takes place a year ago.**

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><p>"<em>What?" He clenched a fist against his side and stared at the man in front of him. Did he hear him correctly? "What did you just say?" He asked with a grating voice. <em>

"_Your sick." Shamal took another deep breath and ran a hand through his messy locks, trying to explain this as calmly as he could. He slowly continued, voice laced with concern, "I know this is very hard for you, and Bianchi informed me that you didn't believe that your mother was killed by some illness. But it's true. All of it."_

_Shamal took a step forward towards the boy, with a hand reached out. Gokudera instantly backed away from him, his eyes large and his emerald orbs almost glazed over in shock. He kept walking away from the doctor, his head shaking back and fourth, silently say no to himself and the other Italian. This couldn't be true. This cant be happening. Gokudera kept backing up until he hit the wall._

_What seemed like only a moment ago, Gokudera had been getting his blood taken so he could get into the 10__th__ grade. Now he was told that he was deathly sick? That he was going to die? _

"_So…." He began, only now noticing that he had slide to the floor, "My father…. didn't kill her? She was…truly sick?" The bomber's voice was shaky, and his body began to tremble. Was everything in his life just one big heap of lies?_

_The Italian doctor kneeled by him and nodded sadly. He didn't speak for a moment, allowing the boy to collect his thoughts. Shamal felt truly heartbroken for him._

"_Your mother…. had come to me one day," He gained the attention of the smaller male as he spoke more about her, "Your fathered had told me, and me only, about his affaire with her. So when she asked me if I could keep a secret, I figured that she was just going to tell me the same thing. I wasn't expecting to hear that she was going to die."_

_Shamal spoke softly, almost in a whisper, and told Gokudera how she was smiling when she told him that. He remembered it so well, the way her silver hair was tied back in a loose pony, and how gentle her face looked. She had told him that she didn't want to be saved, but just wanted to know how long she had left._

"_And so I told her: She had a few weeks, maybe a month at most. She shut her eyes and sat there for a moment, not saying a word. Quietly she stood up, thanked me and left without another word." He glanced down at the other, and smiled softly, stroking his silver hair. Gokudera had his head buried deep inside his arms, hidden away from the world. His shoulders were shaking slightly, and Shamal thought he faintly heard sniffles._

"_This doesn't change anything." He spoke harshly, not bothering to pick his head up form his knees. "My father still lied to me. My whole damn life has been brought up on lies. If your expecting me to be suddenly changed by this, your wrong." _

_The silver-haired teen stood up quickly, his face cold and his eyes distant. "I wont let this shit stop me. I'm still going to be Juudaime's right-hand man. I'm still going to be the Vongola's Storm guardian." His voice was getting louder at each phrase he said to the doctor. _

"_I'm still gonna be apart of a real family, my true family. I'm still going to be the same Hayato Gokudera as I was before. And I wont let my life get ruined again!" _

_After that, he had taken off out of that office at full speed._

_It was dark and clouded outside, a storm brewing up in the distance. Rain was softly falling down onto anyone who dared go near those black clouds, but Gokudera didn't care. He just kept moving as fast as he could, his feet dashing across the wet pavement, not bothering to slow down any time soon. He continued doing what he did best when life got the better of him:_

_He ran away._

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><p><strong>[AN]: He ran away when he was little and he ran away now...its so sad. T_T<strong>

**Please review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** The usual.

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><p>Shadows. They were very unique. They crept, they crawled, but most of all, they hid things right in front of your eyes. Both good and bad, shadows were now apart of everyday life. They could hold many things hidden deep inside, for long periods of time, until someone final stepped up the courage and plunged into the darkness. In many cases, shadows held people, all sorts of people, hiding for different reasons. But perhaps, it was the other way around. The people, or the person, was being the shadow, holding something deep inside and away from others, so that the world wouldn't know what it was until a light was shined upon it.<p>

The light was finally shined on Gokudera's shadow.

Yamamoto stood still, contemplating what to do. On one hand, he could act as if everything was ok, and Gokudera was going to be ok, and just go on about life without a care in the world. On the other hand…

He slammed his fisted palm against the wall and stood up quickly, frustration swelling in his eyes. It had been two days since the confession about his life threatening illness, and Yamamoto was still in shock. After Gokudera had told Tsuna, he had another coughing-up-blood situation and the nurses had rushed the short teen out, and then drugging him so that he could sleep, leaving it up to Tsuna to tell Yamamoto the dreadful news.

At first, Tsuna had expected Yamamoto to believe it was a joke, which he normally did, despite the fact he had matured in so many ways. But he didn't. Instead, the said teen had stayed silent and listened carefully the whole time, never loosing eye contact nor speaking a single word. When Tsuna had finished, Yamamoto had quietly thanked him for telling him, and declared he was going out for a moment.

Tsuna had watched him leave, watched the way he had slowed down as he neared the exit as if he was arguing with himself on staying or not, and then watched him run out and down the street, disappearing into the setting sun. It wasn't a secret what happened to Yamamoto when he returned. His face was pale, his hands were shaking, and his eyes were still red and slightly puffy.

'_They had released Gokudera earlier this afternoon,' _Yamamoto thought to himself as he peered into the other room. His lover was lying on the couch still, almost curled up in a ball with an arm draped off to the side. Grabbing a towel, Yamamoto quickly dried his black, spiky, hair and threw on his clothes. He bent over and drained the tub and re-hanging the towels he had used. _'So…what the hell does that mean?'_

Yamamoto walked out to the living room of the apartment and bent down near the silver haired teen. His eyes were closed and his breathing was soft, a gentle slumber resting upon him. _'Did it mean there was nothing they could do for him?'_ A tan hand reached out and removed some of the silver hair on his forehead, a weak smile placed upon his face. Gokudera's forehead was hot, and slightly sweaty, but he didn't show any signs of being disturbed or even noticing the fever as he continued to sleep. Yamamoto leaned down quietly and placed a quick kiss on the Italian's head, closing his eyes as he did so.

"Yamamoto…." Hazel eyes opened quickly and looked down at the man below him. Gokudera's eyes were still closed, almost tightly, for he was afraid to see the look on the swordsman's face. He opened his mouth again, the first words he spoke coming out in a whisper, and so he stopped and tried again. "I'm sorry…."

Yamamoto stared at him, his eyes wide and confused at why he had just said that. He leaned forward and gently rubbed Gokudera's cheek. "Don't be sorry…its gonna be alright…" Gokudera finally opened his eyes and looked at his crush and lover. His bottom lip trembled slightly, showing that his emotions were about to get the better of him. Upon seeing this, Yamamoto sighed softly and muttered his name before pulling him up into a sitting position and hugging him tightly.

"Trust me, Hayato," Gokduera's shoulders twitched once, "I wont let anything happen to you." Yamamoto pulled back and looked into those sea green orbs he had come to love so much. He didn't dare say the words that came so naturally to him, he couldn't say them to Gokudera at a time like it. It would just make things harder then they already were.

Swallowing the three words, Yamamoto pressed his tan forehead against the pale one in front of him, touching their noses together as well.

"Don't worry about things for right now, just try to relax and focus on getting better." He smiled brightly, being brave for the Italian, and stood up with smirk plastered on his face. "Are you hungry? You've been sleeping all day."

Yamamoto made his way to the kitchen and opened the fridge, examining the contents it held inside. "I'm gonna make us some dinner, alright?" He glanced back at Gokudera, who was staring down at his hands, deep in thought. His stomach decided to ruin his silence as it growled loudly at the thought of food. Embarrassed, Gokudera blushed and swore at his stomach for being stupid and annoying. Yamamoto laughed at him, walking back over for a moment and kissing the top of his head. "I take that as a yes?"

With a scowl, Gokudera waved him off and stood up. "Yeah, I'm hungry. But knowing you, and how much of an idiot you are, your probably gonna make sushi, correct?" Yamamoto's laugh was as good as any 'yes' could have gotten. Gokudera rolled his eyes and walked into his own kitchen, and began to get out the ingredient so he could help out. Pausing as he rolled up his sleeves, Gokudera glanced behind him at the taller man.

"Hey, Yamamoto?"

"Yes?"

"Don't worry about me…ok?" Gokudera turned around and looked at him, his face totally serious. Yamamoto stared back. "Just promise me two things?"

Yamamoto walked over to him and nodded, his smile slipping down into a thin line, and waited to see what it was.

"One, no matter what happens, never loose that dumbass annoying laugh of yours!" His smile came back in full force, and he chuckled absentmindedly, putting a hand on Gokudera's shoulder and saying a quick 'yes sir'.

"And two," Gokudera stood on his toes and got his face as close as he could, touching their forehead's together once more, "never stop smiling."

The silence was unbearable as Gokudera waited for Yamamoto's response. The baseball player grinned and leaned down to gently kissed his boyfriend, but stopped right before he did.

"I promise."

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><p><strong>[AN]: Does anyone know how weird it is to type Gokudera over and over and OVER? Its CREEPY! Review plz!<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** I still don't own KHR, or my 'Dera.

**[AN]:** I just wanted to thank the people who have review this and those who are watching me write this. THANK YOU!

This chapter focuses on how Gokudera's love life with Yamamoto is still new and messed up and stuff, and when Shamal finally arrives. Yay~

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><p>"So, what's wrong with you."<p>

"Nothing."

"Don't lie to me, herbivores suck at lying. And besides," He put his pale hands of his hips, "Your boss already told me."

Gokudera mumbled a curse not so quietly, earning himself a smirk from the skylark, and stood up, Damn it! Why did Tsuna have to tell this guy about his condition? And why did Tsuna tell him to watch over him today? Why not the Extreme freak, or perhaps even the annoying cow? Why Hibari?

"I'm sick. That's all there is too it." Gokudera paused and pointed out into the living room, following behind the black haired teen, "I don't need your sympathy."

Hibari plopped himself down on the bar stool in the kitchen, staring at the Italian with a light smirk never fleeting his face. "I wasn't planning to give it."

Gokudera rolled his eyes and sat down on the couch. He put his hands behind his neck and propped himself up. His gaze ventured all over the man sitting before him. It seemed that the cloud guardian had planned to stay for a while, for he had already changed out of his precious school uniform and into casual clothes. Somehow, Gokudera's eyes had latched onto Hibari's skinny jeans that fit his hips so well….

Wait, what?

"So, Gokudera…." Hibari silently repeated the name in his head over and over. He made a mental note to get used to saying the name if he was going to be apart of the same "family" as him. "How do I take care of you?"

"I don't need you to take care of me! I'm not a fucking child!" The other man simply chuckled at this and slid off the stool, strolling up to the bomber, and bending down low in front of him. Gokudera didn't flinch nor move. He simply stared right back at the other.

Hibari blinked his cold eyes once before pulling back. "Your eyes…." Gokudera furrowed his eyebrows. "What about them?" Hibari turned around and walked into the kitchen.

"…look stupid." He was too deep in thought to hear Gokudera's outburst of rage and the long stream of swear words most likely directed at him, but even if he did hear if, he wouldn't care. The truth was, Hibari had seen the other male's eyes and saw the concern for his own life, was once again gone. But he would never say something as trivial as that. He didn't want to sound like an herbivore himself, now did he? Of course not.

Opening the cabinets in the kitchen, Hibari scanned through them with sharp eyes for the prescribed pills the herbivore was supposed to take. Yamamoto wouldn't not be home until late, tonight, Yamamoto had a major baseball meeting and couldn't be home till some outrageous hour. Not to mention, he had to practice with that silly sword of his. Yamamoto had confronted Tsuna and begged him to watch over Gokudera while he was gone. Grabbing a handful of bottles, Hibari read over their labels looking for the right one. Tsuna had then told him about his lessons with Reborn, but promised to find someone (suitable) to watch over him for the night.

"Hibari! Hibari!" Hibari chirped. Said teen glanced over at the yellow bird. "What is it?" He asked nonchalantly. Hibird jumped off his shoulder and flew around the room, chirping out the Namimori School anthem, and finally landing on a fruit basket and pecking an apple on top. Hibari smirked.

"I cannot believe you taught the poor bird that song. Its ear rape!" Choosing to ignore the comment, Hibari strolled over to the silver haired teen and held out some pills. Gokudera scowled at the man, grabbed the multi colored medicine, and threw them into the back of his throat swallowing them.

Perhaps it was a subconscious action to look tough, swallowing pills without any water, but as soon as he had done it, he knew he regretted it. Gokudera made such a face of disgust and horror that Hibari had burst out laughing. "You really are a herbivore." Cold eyes softened for a moment, only a moment, before the smirk left his lips and he went back to his neutral state.

The bomber had seen it though, and after the initial 'oh my God this tastes awful, shit!' reaction, he leaned back and stared at Hibari. He really wasn't all that bad looking. _'For a bastard…'_ He thought deep inside his head.

His hair was moved and shuffled slightly as something warm buried inside it. Gokudera raised an eyebrow and raised his hand to his head. He stroked something soft and fuzzy. "Appears Hibird likes you." Hibari smiled, "Wake him and Ill bite you to death." The smile was gone.

Gokudera shrugged and shut his eyes. Faintly, he thought he could feel Hibird's pulse on his head, but was too tangled in the warmth the creature was giving off to notice. And soon enough, he had fallen asleep. Hibari smirked at how cute the Italian was looking at the moment. His head was bent back, his hair slightly messy (No thanks to Hibird), and his lips were parted as he breathed softly.

Leaning dangerously close to the bomber's pale face, Hibari whispered, "You better not die, Gokudera. You're one of the only herbivores that truly entertain me."

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><p>With a sigh, a glance, and a smile, Hibari left the apartment and ventured out into the dark depths of the night.<p>

Yamamoto shut the door quietly behind him and groaned lightly at how tired he was. He looked over his shoulder and chuckled. He sauntered over to his sleeping lover, bending down next to him and caressed his cheek. Gokudera was always to innocent and adorable when he slept. Newly bandaged hands picked up the sleeping form and carried him into the other room. Yamamoto held him against his chest and cradled him as he placed the man into bed. Gokudera shifted once to adjust to the change of cushions, but never the less, stayed asleep.

The swordsman silently kicked off his shoes and clothes, and quickly slipped into the nearest pair of pajamas. Crawling next to the silver haired beauty, Yamamoto wrapped his arms around Gokudera and held him close. "G'night Hayato." He kissed his forehead and instantly fell into a deep slumber, too exhausted to stay awake any longer.

Neither of the teens awoke when the home phone started to ring in the kitchen. It blared and echoed through the apartment as the person on the other line waited impatiently for someone to answer. The machine picked up.

"Dammit, Hayato, I know you don't like me but this is an emergency. Pick up the damn phone. It's Shamal, he's here and he wants you at the hospital. NOW."

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><p><strong>[AN]:<strong> Wow. Never expected to see : .com/hitman-reborn-softly-cozy-gratifying-otaku-dakimakura-hugging-pillows-anime-body-pillowcases_?zenid=


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: **I don't own KHR!

**[AN]: In this chapter there's 1 flashback and major side affects from the disease and sad Yama.**

You choose whether or not to be happy :D or sad D: ENJOY!

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><p><em>"Raccogliete tutti su, Antonio, e ottenere in Giappone il più rapidamente possibile. Sì, questa è una situazione di emergenza. Ok, grazie." Shamal hung up the phone with a flick of his wrist and shoved it into the depths of his coat. He ran a hand over his stubble on his face and sighed, turning around and facing Yamamoto, who stood waiting for him. <em>

"_Shamal…" He paused and started over, "What's going on?"_

_Shamal started to walk and gestured for the younger boy to follow him. "I'm sorry to have frightened you, Yamamoto, but it was imperative I see Hayato right away." He looked down, actually, not down at all, at the black haired teen. Yamamoto's head was slightly bent over, and his face was laced with concern._

"_Hey, kid, don't worry about him. He's not in any real emergency right now." Yamamoto's head snapped up. "He's not? Then why-"_

"_-We need his blood." Yamamoto nodded slowly and muttered a low 'okay...'. Shamal stopped walking as they approached the room where Gokudera was. Shamal peered in through the glass window. A nurse was standing next to the bomber, taking several vials of blood from him. "Just a moment ago, the phone call I had just made, was to the all the men and woman who graduated the same medical class that I took. We are the best, of the best."_

_He started to walk again. Yamamoto peered in the window, staring at his lover for a few precious moments, before chasing after the doctor again. "Shamal, why are you taking so much of Hayato's blood? What type of test needs that much?" Gokudera had been in the room for over 10 minutes now. They made their way outside, a cold wind hitting their faces as soon as they exited the building. _'Cold front must be coming….next week is winter break anyways...'

_Yamamoto glanced at the Italian standing next to him, waiting for his answer. A silence washed over the two as they stared at the scenery placed out in front of them, the signs of the upcoming winter at every glance they took. Another cold gust of wind took some colorful leaves from the tree's long branches and whisked them around and about, They flew throughout the air until they traveled down the nearby street and amongst the passing cars, who held people, like you and me, who continued on with their own unique lives. _

"_We're going to make a cure."_

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><p>Yamamoto awoke with a start. His breathing was fast and abnormal and he was covered in his own cold sweat. Damn it…. it was another nightmare. Ever since he had found out Gokudera was sick, he had had these horrible dreams, of his lover, where he keept getting sicker and- No. He couldn't say it. He mustn't even think something like that would happen to him. He was stronger then he looked. Yamamoto reached an arm over and searched around for a Gokudera to hold onto. He found none.<p>

"Gokudera?" Yamamoto rubbed his eyes and sat up, "Gokudera?"

The bed was empty and the covers pulled back, the spot where the Italian _should _be, cold. Where was he? Yamamoto quickly got up and walked around the apartment. He peered down the hall and into the living room. Nope. He walked over to the kitchen and looked around. Not here either.

"Gokduera?" He called loudly this time. He paused, and waited. Still no response. "He couldn't have left, now could he?" He wondered out loud as he made his way back to the living room. In the corner of his eye, a light drew his attention as he peered down the hall. The bathroom room was barely open, the light on, and something red coming out from under the door.

His stomach dropped and his heart skipped a beat. Yamamoto rushed forward and yanked the door open, fear creeping up on him in the dark of the night. Gokudera lied on the floor, a bloody mess smeared around him.

"Gokudera!" Yamamoto cried out, and fell to his knees, picking up the bomber and moving sweaty hair out of his face. Gokudera's face was pale, white even, and blood had dried from his nose and mouth. Yamamoto leaned him against the tub and called out his name over and over, shaking him gently. Finally, a small groan escaped his cracked and bloody lips, revealing that he was indeed still alive.

Yamamoto weakly smiled and held his hand tightly. "G-Gokudera, I'm here. Everything is going to be alright…I'm here. C-Can you hear me?" Yamamoto leaned over and turned the tub on and began to wet a washcloth. He looked down and lifted his lover's chin up, waiting for him to move or speak or anything. The Italian's eyelids fluttered for a moment, and Yamamoto let out a shaky breath, squeezing the cloth and putting it on his warm head.

"Just stay still, Ill call Dr. Shamal in a moment, and we'll get you to a hospital…" Yamamoto swallowed and took the cloth of his forehead and wiped away the blood on his face. "Yama…m-moto…." His head snapped up and was greeted by beautiful green eyes. Green eyes that were…. distant.

"I-I cant see…."

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><p><strong>[AN]: "Gather everyone up, Antonio, and get to Japan as quickly as possible. Yes, this is an emergency situation. Ok, thanks." <strong>

Yes, there will be different languages in this fanfic. The only one: Italian. I thought up the idea that Shamal wasn't the only great doctor in the world, so there must be others. I figured he graduated with a great class of doctors, and called them from all around the world, to Japan, to save Gokudera.

*sniff* For a perv, he can be very nice. And very father-like. Mehhh...that would just be _awkward_ to have **SHAMAL** as your daddy. D:

Review if you like!


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:** I don't own this anime~

**[AN]: IM SO SORRY! **I haven't been posting any new chapters not because I hate you all, but because school just started. :/ So for the long time you all have been waiting, I will be giving you a little snog scene (-insert fangirl scream here-) and without the further delay, chapter 8.

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><p>"Ow…."<p>

…

"Ow…ok, ow!"

…

"OW! GODDAMMIT THAT HURTS!"

Shamal finally pulled the needle out of his eye and glared at him. "Of course it hurts, you idiot. Now shut up or I'll make you go blind for real." He grabbed a large bandage wrap and reapplied it to the Italian's face so that it covered his eyes. "Close your eyes," He instructed, "You must keep this on for a while your vision repairs itself."

Gokudera made a noise in his throat that was unmistakably an 'tsk' of some sort. He laid back in the bed with a sigh and crossed his arms. Although his attitude was the same, his body wasn't. He shifted his shoulder so that the muscles didn't hurt as much and tried to ignore the fact that he was feeling light headed and wanted to puke any given moment. Shamal grabbed a pen and sloppily wrote down something on his pad, a daunting look not so well hidden across his face. Never looking up from the papers in his hand he gently patted the silver haired teen's hand.

"Take a good long nap, Hayato, and stay put. If you need anything," He placed a small remote in his hands, "press that. It'll call a nurse or me. I'll is back soon."

The Italian grunted as his answer of a 'yeah'. Quietly, the door opened and shut, and Shamal had left.

The room was silent. The clock made a constant ticking noise, which suited the hospital style noise quite well. Gokudera took a rather large breath and tried to think of something to do. Really, all he could do was fall asleep, for the room tempted him too much to do so. Now, this wasn't the time of sleep that's comforting and that you usually get from a nice warm room with a light hum of noise and people chatting, no, this was the type of sleep where all was quiet, cold, and boring, and you had nothing else better to do.

He shut his eyes and slowly started to drift off.

Until…

"**IS YOUR BOYFRIEND OK TO THE EXTREME?**" DAMMIT TURF TOP!

Yamamoto looked up from his spot outside Gokudera's room door. Tsuna, and the gang ran to him, all wide eyed and terrified. Well, scratch Hibari. In fact, he was just walking.

Gokudera sat up and smirked sadly. He knew they would have come, Reborn had most likely told them everything. He strained his ears and listened to the conversation going on outside his door.

"Dr. Shamal said he would be alright. His eyesight will fix itself. This is just another one of the symptoms."

Hibari finally made his way to the party. He glanced at Yamamoto, his frown a little more ugly towards him then usual, then headed straight towards the door, his hand on the knob.

"Ah, Hibari-san!" Tsuna squeaked out, "Perhaps we should leave Gokudera-kun alone for a little while. Yamamoto stood up and stared at him. "Shamal said no visitors for the moment."

The teen didn't move. "I don't listen to herbivores." He snapped back easily.

"He's more of an omnivore, actually." Yamamoto commented with as much attitude as him. Hibari turned around slowly, a slightly glint in his eyes, and it definitely wasn't a good one. Gokudera heard the knob slowly un-twist and the hand on it retreated.

The next few words exchanged were too muffled for the Italian to hear. He scooted up more on his bed and held as still as he could. He still couldn't hear anything, only some shuffling and what sounded like little mumbles here and there.

"Oi, I agreed with Yamamoto! Its his boyfriend, so we should extremely listen to him and only him." Ryohei jumped over next to Yamamoto and slung his arm around him. Hibari blinked and walked down the hall and away from the three.

'_Boyfriend?'_ Well sure, its not like the statement wasn't true, (although he would never admit it, that's for sure) but who the hell gave that idiot permission to start using it so casually. What the hell!

The bomber leaned back and snuggled into his covers with some grumbles. He remembered the day where their secret about their relationship got spilled, and hell, it wasn't something he wanted to relive. Of course after Tsuna had caught them, and Tsuna being No-Good Tsuna, he probably told Reborn who told all the other guardians he saw that day. It was…a very…not good day.

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><p>"<em>OI!" Yamamoto quickly shut the door behind them and smiled, white teeth lighting up the small dark space. "Sorry! I just couldn't help myself. Gokudera looks so cute right now~" Yamamoto chuckled and took a few steps towards the Italian.<em>

_Gokudera growled and crossed his arms. "Asshole." Yamamoto pressed his lips against the pale flesh in front of him. Gokudera shut his eyes with a soft sigh. "How come, every time you suddenly get horney or whatever, you grab me and take me to some weird, creepy, place to make out with me. Why I don't end up punching you in the face, is a mystery."_

_Yamamoto made a trail of kisses up his neck slowly, and then kissed his softly. Of course, the softness flew out the window shortly, and soon it was a heated battle for dominance. He was tempted, very tempted, to say it was because Gokudera loved him, but that really would had ended with a punch in the face. "You did the fist time I ever tried, remember?"_

_Gokudera sighed again. "Yup. And you deserved that."_

"_How?" He whined and pulled away with a pout. Gokudera scowled. "Just because you find an empty wall in the shadows, doesn't mean nobody is watching! Your whole baseball team was going to get changed and the locker rooms were right next to it! And also you were sweaty and smelled, so, yeah."_

_Yamamoto laughed loudly. "Oh, did I really?"_

"_Yes! And you smell now too!" _

"_Like what?" He purred._

"_Like an idiot!" Yamamoto keened down and blew a hot breath on his hear, causing the bomber to shiver. "Be nice~"_

"_Or what." He snapped. Yamamoto bite his lip and thought of something. His hand crept down Gokudera's shoulder and down his chest. Gokudera blushed as he thought it was going further down, but instead it paused on his sides. "Or else, Ill do this….SURPIRSE TICKLE ATTACK!"_

"_Wha—AH!"Yamamoto grinned and keep on tickling the silver haired beauty. Gokudera was in pure shock as he keep getting pinched and squeezed and touched. Of course he was laughing the whole time, so all he could do was try to push and shove and punch Yamamoto away. The baseball player wasn't letting up though, and pretty soon, they had fallen to the ground, tickling each other and laughing loudly. They didn't realize how much attention they were attracting and a person who worked on the stage as a techy shouted something to someone to go make it stop._

_They both paused from their childish games and tried to catch their breath. Yamamoto was positioned on top of Gokudera, smiling proudly. Gokudera scowled and started to rant to him about how much of a 'F-ing childish baseball idiot who need to get a life!' he was. Yamamoto leaned down and crashed their lips together, just as the door opened. It was Tsuna._

_Both of them paused and looked up at the 10__th__ generation Mafia Boss. Tsuna stared at them wide eyed and mouth hanging completely open. With a yelp, he ran away as fast as he could, tripping every so often, ready to get blown up at any minuet by Gokudera._

_But at the moment, it wasn't Tsuna who was about to get blown up. Yamamoto took one look at his lover's red and shocked face, apologized quickly and took off as well. The rest off the day was…__interesting__._

* * *

><p>He awoke with a jump. The room was dark and quiet, the clock next to him reading some exceedingly late hour. He sat up slowly. His heart was pounding in his chest. He had dreamt about his mom. His fake mom. How she would tell him stories at night, tuck him in, kiss him and tell him how much she loved him.<p>

It was all a lie. "I have to leave…." He whispered to himself.

He couldn't stand being here, with all these people who cared about him...it would only end in heartbreak and he couldn't let that happen again. He knew oh to well what it was like to love someone and find out it was all…fake. He knew, oh HOW he knew, what it felt like. Besides, it would only get harder for him to leave this world if he stayed with these people, and it was coming soon.

He tore the bandages off his eyes and gently took out the cords in his arm. His whole body was sore, and it took him a moment to adjust to standing up. As soon as he did, he peered out the door's window. Nobody was lurking around in the halls. He slipped out quietly, and slowly made his way to the exit.

'_I'm not worth all this….' _The doors opened. _'I can't stay here….' _He stepped outside. _'I'm better off…alone.' _He took off into the snow, disappearing from sight.

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><p><strong>[AN]: GLPASJFKNAUEFLASFAJWNJFOAJFJ! Holy crap, long time is long! Forgive me! D: Ill try to write more often!<strong>

**PLease review~**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer:** I don't own KHR. **x.x** I wanna stop saying this.

**[AN]: HAPPY BIRTHDAY GOKUDERA!**

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><p>"<em>Mom!"<em>

_Gokudera sat up straight in bed, his little green eyes watered, and his pale pianist hands clutching the bedspread. He waited for a moment, before shifting uncomfortably in his bed. He was too afraid to move from his nightmare, so he stayed putand waited a bit longer. Gokudera stared at the door hard enough to make holes through it, hoping his mother would come in any moment. He just prayed she hear him yelling and not his father... _

"_Mom!" He called out again. There was brief pause in silence, then at last the door opened, and a head peeked in. His mother looked worried, and stepped inside. "What's wrong, Hayato?" He opened his arms. She smiled softy and went over to the side of his bed to hug him, murmuring some comforting words. Gokudera sniffed, and held her close. _

"_Another nightmare?" She whispered. He nodded and pulled away, rubbing his eyes quietly. She sighed and bent down to take her heels off. "How about…" She started, "I sleep with you tonight? Since tomorrow is a special day." _

_Gokudera's head snapped up and he blinked, shocked to hear such things. "R-Really?" He beamed._

_He didn't remember the last time he slept with his mom. He once asked his father, but he offered he slept with Bianchi instead. Gina chuckled at his glowing eyes and stood back up. "Wait here while I change into some pj's, ok?" She quickly left._

_Gokudera jumped up from his bed and ran over to his closet. He pulled out a cardboard box and dragged it over to his bed, kneeling down beside it, and opening it. He kept everything precious to him in here. Thankfully it was a large box, for Gokudera collected anything and everything that caught his eye. _

_The first items on top of the pile were a few stuffed animals, and some toys he had. He turned the stuffed animals around and checked the stitching on the back of them. It worried his mother that he was learning how to use bombs as a weapon, and so she wouldn't allow him to keep them in the house. The only way he could sneak it in was to shove a couple into these stuffed animals. Shifting those down and to the side, the next items were school papers, and cards. The papers mostly consisted on pages he had ripped out of books from the library. (Most of them about aliens and Nessie, the Loch Ness Monster.) He pushed those off to the side as well but was stopped by a certain piece of paper that had some funny black scribbles on it. He pulled it out, and stared at it._

_Gokudera automatically smiled. It was some sheet music for the piano. In fact, this was the one piece that lady had told him that she had written herself and was quite proud of it. He had asked to see it, and she complied happily. It took a few moments, but after the initial trial and error start, Gokudera had started playing the song, almost perfectly. The sound traved all over the house. The lady's eyes had watered up and she had excused her to go to the restroom for a moment. Seeing Gokudera play her music, in a way that looked like they had a real family together…its just was so much on her heart._

_He loved this song, because of her. Because he loved her. And every time she came to visit, he would play it at least once, or more times for her._

_Gokudera's smile faltered and dipped down. He hadn't seen her in over a year now. He looked out his window and let his mind travel around, thinking about where she could have gone. He had thought she was going to come to his third birthday party, but she didn't show up. He had been practicing that song all day long, too, just for her. Where was she?_

_The door shut, causing the almost four-year-old to look up at his mother. She sat down on the floor by him, and wrapped her arms around her. 'Whatcha looking at?" She said while kissing his cheek. Gokudera smiled and placed the sheet music in front of her. "That." He commented. His mother was quiet as she stared at it._

"_Mom, will you read me a story?" He asked. Gokudera held up a small book, with a bright cover and smiled. It was his favorite one. His mother nodded and took the book from his small hands. Gokudera took her hand and crawled into his bed with her, snuggling up against her. The brown haired woman cleared her throat and opened the book to chapter one._

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><p><em>Gokudera had fallen asleep, his arms wrapped tightly around his mother, and snoring peacefully. The brunette looked down at him and kissed his head before turning off the light in the room and standing up to go to bed also. She sighed and glanced down at the floor where the cardboard box and the items still were. Her eyes wandered to the sheet music he had shown her. She knew exactly who gave it to him, and felt her heart grow cold knowing he was so attached to that woman. She reached down and picked it up and examined it quietly.<em>

"_I'm sorry, Hayato." She held the paper over a lit candle until it caught on fire. Gina strolled over to the window and opened it, tossing the paper into the cold night air, letting the breeze carry it off, never to be found again._

"_Happy birthday."_

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><p><strong>[AN]: HAPPY BIRTHDAY GOKUDERA! I LOVE YOU!<strong>

If you love Gokudera also, PLEASE review! Thanks~


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: …moo.

**[AN]:** I just realized...wither I school is completely screwed in the mind, or they're amazingly awesome, but going on a S_CHOOL FIELD TRIP_ to _NORTH CAROLINA_ for an entire _WEEK_...is actually cool! (The camping part will hopefully, be just as fun.)

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><p>It was the first time he noticed how quiet it was.<p>

Gokudera walked slowly and weakly, farther and farther away, to some unknown place to match his heart's desire of being lost and hidden away from the rest of the world. He had no idea where the hell he was, which way he was going, or even how he'll get there, but he kept walking.

He glanced around at the people walking past him, a light hue of chatter coming from the city surrounding the bomber. Different colored lights were shining, blinking, and twirling all around him. It suddenly dawned on him that it was only a week away from Christmas. No wonder he felt so cold and wet.

...

Wait, wet?

Gokudera glanced down and saw that he was indeed, almost soaking wet. He shivered and reached a hand out to touch his shirt, but he stopped right before he did. Gokudera stared at his palm as white flecks drifted down onto it, before disappearing into small droplets of water. He looked up. It was snowing, and snowing hard. It had been snowing this whole time...and he hadn't even felt or noticed it. He knew his senses were going, but now...

Gokudera looked down at his palm and squeezed it into a fist a couple times. He didn't feel a thing. What else was going to be next? His thoughts ran to an utter and complete stop as he felt a familiar churn of his stomach. Legs shaking, Gokudera stumbled into the nearest alley and held onto the dirty wall. He held a hand over his mouth as blood came pouring out. His breathing became shallow and he coughed loudly as his lungs got blocked from all the blood. After a few moments, Gokudera stood back up. His eyelids were drooped and his body was about to give out from lack of strength. But he pushed himself and started to walk again.

The Italian's legs trembled as he staggered and his breathes were shallow and icy ones. Gokudera knew he was gonna pass out any moment, so he tried to find a empty spot to do so, so he wouldn't draw a crowd. An upcoming bridge caught his attention. Next to the stairs of one side was a tunnel, and to the right of that was a small indent where a river ran by. There was nothing but snow and wall in the little indent and it was almost completely hidden in the shadows. Gokudera made his way towards there.

_**Bu-bump, bu-bump, bu-BUMP**_

Black covered his sight and he became blind for a moment.

_**Bu-bump, THUMP**_

His sight flashed back.

'_I have…. I have to make it there…. just to there….' _He thought desperately. He felt heavy, like his whole body was being weighed down by something, making it harder and harder to walk, or even move. Gokudera felt his heartbeat pound in his head and chest. It was loud and hard, causing him to wince every time it skipped a beat or thumped loudly.

He started to wobble and trudged past the steps of the bridge. He was almost there when another _**THUMP**_ cased him to choke. Gokudera gasped and coughed, trying to find oxygen, only to fail. His legs finally gave out and he crashed into the snow, the pressure from hitting the ground so hard, it knocked the air back into his lungs.

Gokudera laid there, panting loudly, eyes squeezed tight and waited for the pain in his chest to fade. He weakly opened his watered eyes and glanced around at where he had landed. It was barley inside the indent, but it was enough. He shut his eyes again and stayed still, until his body gave out, and he fell into unconsciousness.

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><p><strong>[AN]: Read and Review please! <strong>


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: Your smart. Guess.

**[AN]:** _IMPORTANAT!_

**If anyone went to ShadoCON in Nov. in Florida, please inform me! ^^ Thank you~**

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><p>It had been a full day since Gokudera had disappeared. The entire Vongola family was in a state of panic, the group of doctors that had arrived in Japan were freaking out in a way that it seemed like they were raving fangirls, and even Hibari seemed slightly concerned. The most worried, scared, and desperate person of all, was none other then Yamamoto. The moment he found out Gokudera had run away, he looked as if he was going to be sick. His face turned into such a white color, Ryohei had scrambled over and helped him remain standing up just in case he fainted. His hazel eyes were wide and scared, looking at the empty bed as if searching for the one meant to be there. His hands trembled softly and his body went limp. It took everyone's words to keep him from doing something stupid and to make sure he wasn't running off after Gokudera. Three people in total stayed at the hospital to make sure he didn't return, or anything else happened. Bianchi, Tsuna, and Yamamoto were the ones who were out looking for him and the rest were doing anything they could to help.<p>

Winter break was nearing its end as the upcoming of Christmas became more and more obvious, but it didn't seem like anyone was going to have a good one this year. Well….at least not until they found Gokudera.

The clock read the late hour of 11:35 p.m and the hospital was quiet enough to drive someone into the state of insanity. Through the slim automatic door and out into the white night, the three longing souls were having the same situation. It was a silent evening. The wind blew away all the sounds, and all that was left was bitterness. It swallowed up the trio and turned them into a hopeless mess. They paused at a snowy road, taking a moment to catch their breath and replenish their voices. Tsuna bent down, hands on his knees for support and glanced at Yamamoto. He was silent, standing up tall, glancing around them. Bianchi broke the silence.

"You should be wearing more you know. You need to stay healthy, Yamamoto."

He remained silent.

"Here," She said as she removed her scarf, "Put this on. Your nose is completely pink-"

"We need to stop worrying about idiotic things and focus on finding Hayato!" He glanced at her, smacking her hand away from himself. Bianchi stared at him in shock and took a step back.

"Yamamoto…" Tsuna started.

"I don't want to hear it Tsuna! We need to find him! He's been gone so long!" He clenched his fist against his side and gritted together his teeth before continuing.

"In his condition, anything could happen right now. This weather might have, no, _will have_ a major effect on him! For all we know he could be dead!" Dread filled their hearts and minds at the thought of that. Tsuna's eyes widened and he began to think of the worse. "Yamam-"

**_SMACK!_**

"Bianchi!"

The furious pink hair woman didn't take her eyes off him, her lips curved back, and her hand still raised in the air. Yamamoto's eyes stared at the ground, his mouth muscles twitching as if he really wanted to say something, and water pooled into his brown orbs. He turned his head and looked at the sister of his lover.

"Who the hell do you think you are." Her words were like venom, and her teeth were like fangs. Bianchi talked and stood in such a way, that it brought all the more pain into her sentence.

"We've been out here, all looking for Hayato. _Our_, Hayato, _your_ Hayato, _MY _Hayato." She paused and sucked in icy air, "And you have the audacity…the stupidity…to go say and throw around that bullshit?" He voice raised ever so slightly.

"If he was here, he would have said the same damn thing to you, and yet here you are saying how we shouldn't be worrying about you. He is most certainly NOT dead, Yamamoto, Takeshi. How you could even say that, I do not know. Hayato may be my half brother, and he may not love me all that much, but I care about him more than anything else in this world. If this is the way you are willing to speak about him, and this is the way you act when this type of situation happens, then I want you to leave. Hayato doesn't need a person who will put this type of stress on him, he needs someone who truly loves him and treats him with respect. I don't see that in you. All I see is lust and self-fulfillment. You're just that PMS-ing Hibari bastard. You both just want him for his innocence, his body, anything else besides him himself. You need to prove to us, and to him, right now, that you care. Or you can just leave. Go home."

Tsuna looked over at Bianchi, but she had put her goggles on herself and walked off over to the lamppost that stood on the other side of the street, and stood there waiting. The small mafia boss sighed quietly and walked over to the taller male. He knew he was crying by his body language, the fact his head was bent over, the fact his shoulders were shaking, everything. Tsuna turned him to face towards him and wrapped his arms around him and presses his head against his shoulder. Yamamoto hugged back greedily and sobbed, small sniffs escaping him every once in awhile. They both stood there like that, for what seemed like eternality, before they let go.

Yamamoto wiped his eyes and looked up at the dark sky. Tsuna ran his hands through his brown locks and sighed once more.

"She's right…." Tsuna looked up just as Yamamoto looked back down and stared at him. "I do care….I love him so much…."

"I know you do…"

"That's why I should go."

"What?"

"I need to go back and re-remember why I love him. I need to remember and fill my heart and mind and soul with that, and that only. Then, after that, I will come back."

Tsuna bit his lip and nodded slowly. He understood what he meant, all this stress, all this pressure, all this trauma had broken Yamamoto's spirit. He needed time for a boost. Tsuna patted his shoulder and smiled softly. "Be back soon. He needs you."

"….I'll try, Tsuna. 'Cause….I need him too."

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><p><strong>[AN]: HOLY SH!T ITS BEEN SO LONG I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!<strong>

**Please review and comment and stuff!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: **:/

**[AN]: Slight spoilers! (Possibly?)**

As some of you must be wondering, this is a STRICT 8059. No, Hibari*Goku. In upcoming chapters you will find out why Hibari is flirting with him. Also! Now that we're on this topic of 'Dera, this chapter will focus mainly about him and what's happening. Also!

…

**THANK YOU ALL FOR THE FAVS AND COMMENTS! **

I looked at my email today and I saw all the love from you guys. :D So, as a thank you, I am currents taking _**2**_ requests for stories or whatever. The first people/people who comment the most will get them.

_Ok, so a few warning for this chapter:_

_-Swearing_

_-Swearing_

_-Creepers (Nothing new right? :P)_

Alas, I'm rambling. (Teehee!) So without further ado… (Jeses! _{YES, I SPELLED IT WRONG ON PURPOSE}_ Look at all the fancy words I'm using! You'd think I'm British or something!)

**PART 12.**

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><p><em>What a fool he was.<em>

"Hey! Check it out!"

_What an absolute, balky, fool he was_.

"What is it?"

"It looks like a kid!"

"What's with him? Covered in blood and shit…."

"Maybe he was in a fight?"

_What a complete, narcissistic, idiotic, thick assho—_

"**Ghnn**!" Pain ripped through the Italian's spine.

"Man, what did you do?"

"I just gave him a little kick, that's all."

Sadly, the victim of the rigid kick happened to be Gokudera's ribs. He doubled over and groaned out again in pain, his chest throbbing from the sudden wake up call and from his heart beating rapidly.

"Well, he's alive, that's for sure."

"We should take him back with us, yeah? He could sure be some fun!"

Gokudera pushed himself and opened a lively green eye. _'Fun?'_

"I dunno….he seems too young."

"Like that's ever stopped you before!" What sounded quite like a roar suddenly erupted from the boisterous voices. Trying to lift his head and look around, the bomber found that he couldn't move at all, his body which had been out in the cold far too long felt like it was a frozen rock. He inhaled quickly, too quickly, and ended up coughing out the icy air, drawing the men's attention.

"Pick him up. We could use this as a make up gift for the boss for our last failed mission. Besides, we get in trouble with the Keisatsu, we'll just toss him in the back. No one will find him."

A pair of two, strong, muscular arms wrapped around the base of his head and gripped his silver locks with fierce demand. With a flick of the owner's wrist, he hauled the poor Italian up by his hair causing a pitiful and small whimper to slip past his pale lips. The men ignored the sign of pain.

"Lets go."

He felt another arm grab him under his armpit and haul him into a more comfortable and easier to drag position. His cold feet scrapped across the concrete sidewalk as his body moved on its own accord. Before he even knew what hit him, he blacked out once more.

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><p>It's was a funny thing, in his mind, as he thought more and more about it. Gokudera secretly loved music, more then any other sport, activity or anything else for the matter, and he could listen to it for hours and hours on end, as if it was speaking to him, whispering in his ear. But this….this was different.<p>

Loud, jumpy, and erotic music blared around his poor ears, casing the silver haired bomber to jolt awake with a small whimper. When he opened his innocent looking emerald eyes, they watered from the amount of smoke in the room. After, his nose twitched at the reek of so many combinations of sweat, blood, man cologne, and more disgusting things words wouldn't dare describe. The spacious room was extremely overcrowded (Oh how **badly** he wished a certain carnivore would come and bite them all to death) and was filled with a degree of various men, all the while, Gokudera was still being dragged.

"Oi!" He weakly barked out, "P-Put me down!" The two men, with their iron grip still locked on him, continued walking as the obnoxious music drowned out any and all his efforts to get their attention. "God dammit, put me down! HEY!"

After what seemed like an eternity of pure torture for the Italian, his lungs now sore and tired from all his screaming, they had reached the end of the room where a dark hallway led off to metal doors that most likey led to more rooms (seriously, what the hell was with this place?) and a staircase at the very end. The men nodded to a certain black guard that stood there and blocked off the area for intruders. As they took him down the hallway, the noise level almost immediately dropped to a low hum showing off the fact it was extremely sound absorbent, yet Gokudera stayed quiet despite the fact he could shout freely now. They led him past the metal doors and straight to the stairwell where they promptly dropped Gokudera on the ground where he landed with a "oof!".

"What the hell was that for you bastard!" He held his nose, sure that it was broken, and propped himself up on an elbow to glare at both of them, quietly analyzing their bodies. The one to his left was a tall, skinny looking fellow with curt blonde hair and a creepy grin. He almost reminded him of the Varia's own creeper, Bel, had it not been for the fact that he seemed incredibly weak and his face was covered in scars. Bel wouldn't let anyone dare touch him, let alone make a scar on him. As his mind raced on to rant about the stupid Varia, and their dumb shitty attitudes, he could help but wonder if he would ever see them again. See Tsuna again. See Yamamoto again...

As if he was slapped in the face, Gokudera shook his head frantically remembering the reason why he ran away in the first place. _'Just shut the hell up, Hayato. You don't need to think about this shit.'_

Scoffing at the blonde, Gokudera's eyes darted to the next male, a tan Spaniard who seemed like a good match for anyone. His hair was in a short brown bob, hidden underneath a black newsboy hat. He chuckled at his short outburst, showing off some gold teeth. Gokudera furrowed his eyebrows in disgust.

"Get up. We're not going to do extra work and carry you if you can walk," The blonde paused and stared at him trying to figure out what to call him. He growled, giving up and pulled out a gun. "Go!" He pointed up the stairs.

_'Why do they always allow idiots to carry guns?'_ He though to himself with anger.

Slowly, Gokudera rose to his feet, unsure if his own legs could hold up his own body weight. Once he felt secure that he wouldn't fall he turned around and started his ascend up. It was a short trip up, and with a gun pressed against his back, Gokudera wasn't too focused on how badly it hurt to move, rather... he just wanted to go home. And that's all his tired mind could think about at the moment. By the time they had reached the top, Gokudera's color had drained out from his face and body, making him look…well, horrible.

The stairs spread out into a large, open office looking area, big enough to be called a ballroom. There were some couches facing each other as you walking in, a large bar to the left, followed by bathrooms. In the very back and center of the room was a large couch, more like a huge love seat, that was turned backwards so it faced away from the small crowd of people and looked out the window in front of it. In the seat, was a man, surround by woman, slaving over him from the looks of it. Gokudera's eyes had grown twice his size as his mind wandered at where the hell he actually was.

"Keep walking." The Spaniard told him. Gokudera, hesitantly, walked forward, past the people, through their smoke, and to the man. "Stop." He froze.

The man had his arm wrapped around a girl, and wine glass in the other. He chuckled and sipped at the red liquid, not even noticing he was there.

"Boss!" The blonde shouted, "We found you something'~!"

The silence the man gave off caused the youngest in the room to shiver out of fright, for it gave him the impression of the silence before a bomb went off. The woman around him got up and off him and allowed him to turn around and stare at Gokudera who had summed up the courage to give him his best death glare he could, teeth bared, and eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Woa." He smirked around the cigar in his mouth and took a deep breath only to blow repulsive outcome into his face. Gokudera huffed and blew it away acting as though he was better then that, despite the fact he too smoked every once in a while when stressed would overwhelm him, but this placed reeked so badly of it it made him want to gag and that was quiet obvious. The strong boss-like-man stood up and walked around the couch casually, observing Gokudera's movements and they way his eyes darted side to side trying to find a way out, or hatching a plan of attack.

"What are you thinking about, Mr….?" He waited for a name.

"Its none of your damn business." He spat. The man chuckled and ran a greasy hand through Gokudera's soft locks who in return slapped his hand away and stepped back muttering curses in Italian. The man's smirk only grew larger as he understood the sailor mouth of the hotheaded teen.

"_Two can play that game, kiddo._"Gokudera growl was his only response. The man fiddled around in his pockets for a moment before taking out a small, purple sack. "Hold him down."

Before he even had a chance to react, Gokduera was thrown to the ground by several subordinates and was held still. Kicking and screaming, Gokduera tried to free himself from the chaos, which only result in tighter reinforcement. The man kneelt down besides him and waved someone over to give him a hand. "Now, Mr…It's none of my damn business, I'm going to make this very simple for you, so listen well, ok? Open your mouth and take this," He held out a somewhat see through white pill, "and it'll be over. If you don't want to take it then we'll just have to hurt you." It was simple enough.

Gokudera lay still for a moment, panting hard, and giving the man a heated glare. About to resort to spitting in the man's face with some strong language, Gokudera caught something out of the corner of his eye. The blonde that had apart of the group that had captured him earlier stood behind the Italian Boss, a glowing hot red metal pipe in his hand. Gokudera looked further behind him to see that there was a fireplace next to the bar.

His eyes widened as the creeper neared him causing him to panic and kick harder and harder at the men holding him down. His foot got a lucky shot and kicked one of the gang members square in the face. Stupidly, he laughed in triumph. The man raised his fist and quickly proceeded to beat the shit out of him in the process.

The Italian Boss watched with satisfaction before calling the man off and holding out the pill again. "Which one shall it be?"

Gokudera opened his pale green eyes (soon to be black) and sniffed up the blood pooling out of his nose. He smiled back at the man before saying, "Fuck you."

The man chuckled, stood up and pushed the blonde forward. With a sigh he took out another cigar and lit it slowly, watching with anticipation the loud and blood boiling screams to come.

"**Burn him**."

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><p><strong>[AN]:<strong> Like it so far? **_COMMENT!_**

Alright, well that took forever to type! Whew! I deserve **food!** Which, by the way, **Happy Thanksgiving**!

If any of you have suggestions or questions about this, please feel free to comment. Also, for any Black Butler ('**BASSY!**) fans out there, I will announce now that I am in the procces of making some new stories featuring:

-Ciel*Sebby

-Grell*Sebby ('**BASSY!**)

-And more. :D

So I look forward to writing more! Thanks again!


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